Well my weights this week have been all over the place...in fact they're increasing....which is pissing me off because I've been eating nearly clean....small minor oppsies...nothing like before...and last year weight fell off me when I ate clean, this time, not so much....I'm doing ichoice starting next week. It is a program run through lyf.com....one shake, one vitamin pouch and a carb and fat blocking drink that are supposed to detox you of sorts....I have a 30 day package I stole from Groupon...something has got to work!

Day 2

Well I've made it to day 2....of the rest of my life....did a bit better today. Went for a nice long walk today....Was rewarded with an increase in my weight today...can't avoid weighing...I am obsessed....but I am also trying and feel like each day is a step in the right direction!

Updated

So I updated my two weight tickers..and the blogs I read. I've survived day one with only one minor detour. I ate pretty healthy and managed not to eat everything in site. I was primarily allergy free. I took my vitamins. And had a protein shake. And worked out with my trainer....I wish every day was like today....

Lost and Found

A common thread for most of the weight loss community is periods of great success and periods of failure....I have had both and often remarked that I find it fairly easy to lose 20 pounds but incredibly difficult to string together those efforts. My employer is requiring me to work with a wellness coach, provided by my insurance to achieve a goal. The goal I set is to eat clean for one week, starting tomorrow. Last summer I ate clean for 2 months and lost a bunch of weight, seems like a no brainer right? But nothing worth fighting for is ever easy. So tomorrow I embark on my first week of eating clean again. I go to my dr on Saturday to start to figure out why I am unable to get pregnant. Tomorrow becomes the first day of the rest of my life. My husband made fun of me today while we were shopping saying that this was the millionth try....and I just responded I'm going to try again...because if I don't try....I'm dead.

Down 2.6 this week....hopefully I can have multiple weeks of losses, even if they aren't big and I can feel successful....losing weight is so unrewarding....things need to move faster in order for people to keep it up....

Opps....

Again I've been slacking.....I don't know why I can't focus. I have all of these great ambitions and reasons to do this, I have all of these great tools and when push comes to shove, I just take the high road. I have two contests going on right now....one is between a coworker and myself and everytime we work out, we put a dollar in a jar. The first one to $100 wins. The loser has to buy the other one lunch when we go out to spend our prize money. I'm up to almost ten dollars over nearly 3 weeks....but exercising hasn't been my problem....it's been my eating. I know that realistically I just need to follow my allergen free diet and the weight will pour off....I don't know what my hold up is. The second contest is with a second friend of mine...similar rules....$0.25 for every workout....must either checkin on FB or text pictures....we both use a fitbit....and $1 for every pound lost...weekly weigh ins texted on Mondays....at $20, we go out and do something physically active and the other provides the meal....I'm trying to convince my husband to do something too....if anyone out there wants to wager with me....I'm game - let me know!

Not keeping up my end of the bargain

I told myself that I was going to blog more this year than last year, I was going to lose weight, I was going to make an effort to look better....I have such drive and no follow through. I haven't blogged in six weeks....don't worry you haven't missed much. I've been working both jobs faithfully, working out faithfully and trying to deal with some family stuff. My grandma has been sick and my sister in law is quite pregnant. I've lost 13 pounds and am starting to change shape. I have got to constantly remind myself to not be disappointed with the results...I've only worked out six weeks. I am struggling eat right....zero willpower...and my goal is so different now. I want to be healthy and I want a baby....and both things seem so far out. And I feel so guilty spending time on myself, and my husband is giving me a hard time....and I know I could be so much more successful....I just need to keep my goals in sight...someone help me...l