I snapped today...it was bound to happen. We had a meeting very early this morning with one of the docs I work with that I find really challenging. The meeting didn't start off well because the md was being difficult and I was struggling. Kitty has been having seizures and falling down...I am struggling with what to do....he is so happy, purring non-stop....eating, drinking, going to the bathroom. He walks fine too. But suddenly, he stands up and starts twitching, and then sometimes falls over...I know his time is fast approaching, but I don't feel he's there yet. And I feel like such a fool for being so attached.....but this cat and I have bonded in an indescribable way and I know that no matter how many cats I will have in my life, he will always be my favorite pet. My first cat will always have a place in my heart as well, but her personality just didn't suit what I'd imagined as a little girl. And of course, I love my other cat...but my pumpkin is just special! My husband's about to lose his job. The building that houses his business was foreclosed and is being auctioned in 10 days. We already have bills that far exceed our income. This hit, during the holidays, is not welcome. My mother in law put down one of her cats yesterday, it hit really close to home. So any way, at work, I cover 3 clinics and it's wearing me down. I have two bosses, one for my primary clinic and one for the other two I cover. My primary boss is out on maternity leave and my other boss hates me...in fact I think everyone does....so much negative feedback, about all different things...and yes, I realize that if that many people are saying something about me, I probably have a problem...but a lot of this is personality....I am who I am...so the boss that hates me calls me out about the meeting this morning...I was cold and abrubt.....I wish I just never spoke, it's hard to withdraw when you're normally so open...yet no one really knows me...and I lost it...about covering 3 clinics, about the cat, my husband, my year, how my company took away my paid time off because they thought I cheated the system but gave it back and I still don't really have any time off....so I was supposed to work sunday since we're closed Thursday and she told me I couldn't go to work...she was banning me...but I want to go to work...and she's taking away the third clinic because the social worker I share it with had a shift in her other case load. I feel like all I do now is cry and wait for my cat to die....I think I hate me...